Henheart's Universe
Main Discussion => The Poetry Corner => Topic started by: Haggis-chan on October 05, 2004, 05:48:27 PM
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Me had to write some poetry for English this week, and naturally I thought it sucked. But because Amy-chan is our regular poetry person, I got her to look over my poetry. And for some strange reason, she thinks it's good. And she encouraged me to post some up here. So, please, no olive throwing. v_v And I apologise in advance for some of the crap here.
This one has a working title of Shades of Pain.
This can either be percieved as someone in great pain, or me getting very annoyed with my heat rash. Enjoy. *cough* (This is free verse, btw).
It's just a little red.
It'll pass soon enough.
I'm ignoring it.
It's disappearing.
Blotches of fire.
All over me.
Burning through my skin.
They're fading like dead stars.
Heaps of Crimson.
They're invading one by one.
Fire is spreading through my veins.
They're claiming me.
Scars of fury.
They beg for me to let them bleed.
I scratch away endlessly.
The scars become me.
*dodges olives*
Should me embarrass myself excessively by posting more?
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i love that poem and too right you should have put it up earlier ^__^
post more *repeats*
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Sorry, but that sucks muchness...
In my opinion anyway. I don't see anything good there...
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i do
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Care to explain what, exactly? ^_^
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It's okay......... the topics a bit crap isnt it.......? :-\
Ode to blotchy skin....
remember only a truth friend would be that truely honest! ;D
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Thank you, someone who is honest...
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what and im not V__V
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I like the imagery in it, the different pictures of red things and whatnot. It makes me want to start scratching though .. ^_^;;
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i think its cool and way better than mine
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*Wanders in late*
Me seriously likes it Liz, the topic's unusual yeah - but that's what poetry's about, writing about what affacts YOU and not what might sound good or impressive or noble. In that sense, this could be just as worthy a poem as some of Amy-chan's best (and that's a big compliment to you both, don't worry ^_^)
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every writer can see the problems in their work thats why i hate mine so much........
the only poem i like that ive wrote was 'wrapped in a blanket of fallen tears'
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This is good work liz you get an A and a shiny! but when i read it i started to scracth like crazy!
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That was kinda the point actually, I was really itchy at the time, wanted to portray what I was feeling at the time...
I still think it sucks though.
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believe what you like liz i dont think that....
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i don't think it either
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Okies, here's another poem of mine, it sucks, but never mind =P
The look you gave me,
I can't work it out.
It's driving me crazy,
Eyes clouded with doubt.
The look you gave me,
It doesn't seem to scare,
I glance out to see,
a soul with a scrappy tear.
That touch you gave me,
I don't flinch at all.
That scar on my knee,
...is this another fall?
That touch you gave me,
it's burning me now.
Your passion throws me down,
...This is love, not hate?
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It seems good to me Liz-chan, Mee likes it! ^__^ The last line breaking the rhyme pattern makes it stand out. It could be a song lyric too. ^_^
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as you already heard i love this poem :P
i like the way domestic violence is portrayed in a poem :P
welldone
*glomps*
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THIS POEM IS COOL!!
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I like that peom! It is muchly better than anything I write...that be why I no write poems anymore, I be suckkyful at it. I needs to start again though, me has to write for English soon and me not be in practice anymore...
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my english teacher keeps wanting me to show her my poetry... which i dont want to cos most of its depressing and stuff about myself >.<