Henheart's Universe
Main Discussion => The Poetry Corner => Topic started by: Froggie chan on June 19, 2004, 09:01:06 AM
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Lost
I sit on the wall where I used to talk to you,
But now it’s moss covered and neglected,
That’s how I feel now,
I walk the path we used to walk down,
Forgotten and alone now,
That’s how I feel.
Nothing now can change it,
It’s your fault I’m like this,
No one now to help me find my way,
I’m wandering round in circles,
I’m lost in the place you once called home,
Tripping over lost thoughts and feelings,
I’m lost.
I stare at the tree that you carved our names on,
But now ivy smothers them,
Like I’m smothered by reality,
I cry at the site of the our secret place,
It’s lonely and cold,
Like inside of me,
Nothing now can change it,
It’s your fault I’m like this,
No one now to help me find my way,
I’m wandering round in circles,
I’m lost in the place you once called home,
Tripping over lost thoughts and feelings,
I’m lost.
I’m lost in our world,
The one you used to call ours,
Come back to me now,
No one now to help me find my way,
I’m wandering round in circles,
I’m lost in the place you once called home,
Tripping over lost thoughts and feelings,
I’m lost.
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It sounds like you just broke up with a boyfriend Amy-chan. *Hugz* It's very well written and I love the metaphors that you use, they really bring out your feelings. ^_^
Have you written many others like this Amy-chan? You're really good! ^_^
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hmmm brings back the memorsy... have posted this one befor some were I think and will post it again...
My life now ended, now when you have left me
My love you spread across the field of sadness
On rosen leafs you were buried
And so as to your eternal beauty
On wings of sadness you will travel
Against your eternal sleep
Humanity will pay the price for my remorse and pain
I will bring it to it's knes, slowly make it fade away
Slowly to be forgotten
This world all so wrong
I will burn it all down and watch it glow in the dark
I know I have done wrong, but so shall it be
Because my life were ended a long time ago
Now I walk across the astral sky
To find the hidden door so we can be united forever
At last I close my eyes to join the wind of passion
To feel my soul burn within myself
Slowly fade away....
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prettiness
me have other poems like this one...
HOLDING ON
Drowned in your sorrow,
I try to show a brave face,
But inside I’m crumbling,
I’m fading away.
You broke my heart once,
And the pain is still there,
Even after all these years,
I long for your face.
You let my hand slip,
You let me fall,
Into the darkness,
Of forgotten hope,
I can hear your voice echoing,
Off stone walls,
But you’re too far away,
We drifted apart.
I’m holding on to that wish,
The one we made,
Under the stars,
To be together always.
by the way i've never had a boyfriend in the 14 years of my life
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by the way i've never had a boyfriend in the 14 years of my life
Me too, we should start a club...
I've seen your poems before Amy, and I think theyre really good...
But Framer, your poem there is really pretty, and written really well, especially since English isnt your first language. (I think thats true, anyway...)
It seems everyone has a creative side apart from me. It really sucks...
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u have a creative side and i act better than i can write anyways
ur creative side is writing sitcoms
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hmmm *think about leting mjh reopen the old poetry corner...*
*thinks about it again*hmmm nah better skip that
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*coughs*
Im crap at the sitcom thing, and creativeness altogether.
Framer, why dont you ask MJ to open up the poetry corner?
Love to see some more of your work. ^__^
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dont wanto state any reson but that topic will remain closet or even better be removed completly
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The Poetry Corner topic was moved to the archives, so it could be brought back if you wanted me to do that Framer. But I know why you wanted it taken down, so I won't bring it back just because someone else might ask for it. The request would have to come from you Framer. If you would like it permanently removed I can do that too.
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it can stay the way it is and it feels good to know that it wont be open with out me saying so... sorry for formulating it in a bad way but it is to many things back there and it is best that they stay "back there"
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thats okies even though all my poems are depresing me wrote a new one last week...
DREAM
Floating through space
Searching for the light
Time standing still
Friends are stars
The moon is my love
Both are gone
Blackness smothers all life.
Memories glazed in silver
Swimming in the black abyss,
That is my mind,
Crying out in despair,
No answer to my call,
No emotion felt,
In my heart.
What is it with me and depressing stuff i wish i could write happy stuff
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Hey, at least its good.
We could have a new poetry corner instead of opening up the old one, I suppose. Just an idea, methinks.
^__^
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wont stop you but I can promis to post there
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A few times I've seen threads reincarnated on boards, and most of the time people will just add a number to the title like The Poetry Corner 2, The Poetry Corner 3, etc. So if anyone wants to start an new one, be my guest. ^_^
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Yay, I had a good idea!
Considering I dont write a lot of poetry (I suck at creative stuff), I'll let Amy, Simmi or Framer make a new one.
^__^
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like I said befor... I wont take any part of it
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I already made mah topic, unfortuately fictionpress is being a bitch
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dont look at me *everyone stares*
and people wonder why im paranoid
me lacking in inspiration at the mo so no new poems..... yet
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i noticed no one was talking on these boards for a while so i put a new peice of work on...
Happy Ever After
I was once a princess,
In a far away land,
With dreams of my prince at hand,
And happiness to look forward too,
But now it’s all gone,
Will it ever return?
Whatever happened to,
My happy ever after,
Like they have in storybooks,
Was it lost in a dream?
Or is it trapped in your heart?
You were my prince,
But now you’re gone,
Your last words were,
To look inside of me,
For the truth about me,
And to figure out
Why I’m hiding from it.
Whatever happened to,
My happy ever after,
Like they have in storybooks,
Was it lost in a dream?
Or is it trapped in your heart?
I’m sick of this,
I want to be free,
In your arms,
Please,
I just want to escape,
Just find the truth,
And to find out…
Whatever happened to,
My happy ever after,
Like they have in storybooks,
Was it lost in a dream?
Or is it trapped in your heart?
Whatever happened to,
My happy ever after,
Like they have in storybooks,
Was it lost in a dream?
Or is it trapped in your heart?
I was a princess,
In a far away land.
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Happy Ever After
I was once a princess,
In a far away land,
With dreams of my prince at hand,
And happiness to look forward too,
But now it’s all gone,
Will it ever return?
Whatever happened to,
My happy ever after,
Like they have in storybooks,
Was it lost in a dream?
Or is it trapped in your heart?
You were my prince,
But now you’re gone,
Your last words were,
To look inside of me,
For the truth about me,
And to figure out
Why I’m hiding from it.
Whatever happened to,
My happy ever after,
Like they have in storybooks,
Was it lost in a dream?
Or is it trapped in your heart?
I’m sick of this,
I want to be free,
In your arms,
Please,
I just want to escape,
Just find the truth,
And to find out…
Whatever happened to,
My happy ever after,
Like they have in storybooks,
Was it lost in a dream?
Or is it trapped in your heart?
I was a princess,
In a far away land.
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Hmm, I like it Amy-chan, but have I heard it somewheres before?
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not that i know of
its proberly similer to others but i dont copy other poets work its wrong *shakes head*
its supposed to be lyrics to one of my other friends bands as i write some of their lyrics but im quite proud of it... not the best but not the worst ^__^
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There is music that goes with it? I'd love to hear it played as a song Amy-chan ... if that's possible, please? ^_^;;
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havent played it as a song yet i just wrote random words but if its chosen and made into a random song then ill make sure you hear it ^__^
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Yayness!! ^__^
I like regular radio music, but there's something a lot more special about a song written by a friend. ^_^
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Erm, uhh, this is where I saw this before ...
<-- Is such an airhead. v_v
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yep ^__^
yay another fan that makes 5
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^__^
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*starts to write again*
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Yayness!! ^__^
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BLADE-
Deliberate pain,
Inside myself,
Mental self-gone,
Physical self-scarred,
Lying alone in a room,
All friendships lost,
Hand reaching up to eyes view,
Red marks scar it,
The beauty,
Confidence and dignity,
Has been stolen by an emotion,
That is silent,
That can destroy,
But is the basis of all life.
this will be my last poem as im giving up writing them sorry to disappiont if anyone cares
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It's such a sad poem, filled with hopelessness, yet elegant and beautiful at the same time. However, I'd like to see you write more because I do care Amy-chan. Pain and sadness aren't things that people imagine, they're real. *Huggles Amy-chan.* ^_^
If you're interested in some more very sad, hopeless, but beautifully written poetry, look at the Old Testament Book of Lamentations (http://www.usccb.org/nab/bible/lamentations/lamentations1.htm).
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sorry but i cant write anymore its too hard and frustratingV_V
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Memory
Even though
All the years
I never saw
Who you really were
I shied away
Too scared to speak
I wish I could take it back
I never saw
You in the spotlight
The shadow of illness took care of that
I cant even remember
Your smile
Theres so much I want
To tell you
But I cant
Your out of reach
You are the hope in my soul
You’re a memory
Dedicated to the late Ellen paddock my great grandmother.
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It seems like she was someone that you liked a lot, but weren't able to become friends with her. It's kind of sad. *Huggles Amy-chan* I can remember very little of my great-grandparents, but those memories are of kind and friendly people.
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ever since the year of my birth she suffered with parkinsons disease and glucoma which is why i never knew her. being the shy person i am i never spoke to her alot and because i was young i dont remember much
i just wish she was her for someone to talk too
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Wrapped in a blanket of fallen tears,
Cloaked in the darkness that is my only comfort,
Holding the hand of the past I wont let go,
Piecing together my broken heart.
The pain clouds the innocence of my future,
The fear in my past protects me,
From the grief that digs it claws into my flesh,
Sheltering under the roof of my despair.
The depression is my freedom,
The lies are the truth,
The loneliness warms me as I’m,
Wrapped in a blanket of broken dreams.
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Some really wonderful contrasts in each line Amy-chan. Very pretty, but very sad too. *Hugz Amy-chan.*
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i wanted it to contrast as i dont write many contrating poems. i had the first line and wanted to contrast the rest of the poem. im really proud of this poem which is really rare *shrugs*
i would like to thank sheepy chan for the emotions despair and innocence. i would alos like to thanks tom for the emotion depression. thanks guys i would have never finshed this poem without you ^__^
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Parkinson's is a really hard thing because it only affects the person on the outside while their mind is just the same as it has always been. My grandfather had it just before he died and I can remember how difficult it was to try to communicate with him. At the same time, I could see in his eyes that he was still there and he recognized me. It must have been like being in a prison ...
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sometimes i feel like shes here and shes watching me and guiding me... i just wish she was here just a little longer so i could a least talk to her again V_V
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my english childhood poem:
Childs Play.
She stands in a corner awaiting a customer,
Her face alighted with a happy smile,
She waits while an adult potters around,
Pretending to make a discission of what to buy,
The child grows tired of watching and waiting,
And tidies her objects to sell,
Like her favourite teddy,
And a basket of plastic fruit,
While she waits for the adult,
Who takes their time,
Picking up an old ragdoll,
And handling it,
Examining its soft cloth face,
The beady eyes show the reflection,
Of the impatient child’s face,
The adult reacting comes over to pay,
Handing over plastic coins,
The child’s face gleams with joy,
As the money lies in her hand,
Still warm,
All thoughts of the waiting forgot.
But then the shop must close,
The toys are not for sale anymore
But are toys again,
The money returns to its keepsake box,
And the objects are returned to the child’s bed,
Or her toy box in the corner,
The happy shop,
The make shift shop,
Has returned to a living room,
A room where adults rule again.
one for one of my oldest friends louise ^_^
You stand in the crowd,
Oblivious to other people’s remarks,
You don’t care at all,
You happy being you,
You don’t mind who your friends are,
You a star of glimmering light,
A shelter for those who need,
You wisdom,
Your guidance,
Your optimistic outlook.
You are the rock I need beside me,
You’re a friend in your heart,
And have a soul full of goodness,
You may have to fall now and again,
But you always stand tall,
Above the crowd with your happiness and your hope.
You the person I wish to be,
The happy one with the luck in the world,
But above all a great friend.
This ones about the RPG character in Neil and mines RPG ^__^
Truth
I’m hiding away under the moon,
It alone knows the truth,
It alone knows my hearts broken,
It alone knows my fate.
I told you the truth and you said I lie,
It looks as though you know little,
About me or my troubles,
I’m sick of hiding away.
Its time they knew,
Its time I come clean,
No matter what they say,
I’m white inside
The white of goodness,
Nothing else.
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OMG amy that rocks!!!!
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O.o their not that good neil......
i dont like them but i thought that some people may want to read them
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Knifes Edge
Trapped in the minds eye,
Surrounded by shadows,
Suffocated by the loneliness,
Drowning in forgotten dreams,
Lost in the darkness,
Soundless screams echo,
Sharp blood tinted knives,
Point their murderous ends,
At my weak skin,
Pocessing my mind,
Playing with my emotions,
As if they were childhood toys,
My dying heart is pierced,
And the dark red liquid falls,
A scream of pain,
And I awake,
From my nightmarish reality.Â
UNNAMED!! ( help!!)
shes a face corrupted by shadows,
shes a mind pocessed by lies,
shes unconcious mentally,
shes the image of the,
dark emotions inside our souls,
shes dispied and hated,
amoung those of us strong enough,
to fight her while the weaker of us,
are drowned in her embrace,
Shes so silent you can hear a pin drop,
But as deadly as a cobra,
Shes sheilds herself from the truth,
her former self dormant inside her,
waiting for the chance to break free,
from the boundaries that smother her.
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this is very good amy you really r a good poet!!!! i think for the unamed one u should call it forgotten
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maybe its about hiding your true self with someone you hate....
forgotten may fit... i dunno... thanks anyways neil
*gives shiny* ^_^
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'Safe Haven' pops up into my mind from reading it, and also the word 'smothered' and 'inner demons'. Doubt that helps, but meh...
Much better than what I could write...
<- is screwed for English Coursework
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i like the inner demon one alot...
i reminded you about your english coursework >.<
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inner demon sounds good thanx for the shiny!!!!
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They're both seriously good, I especially like the second one...I'm no good on titles, but I'd suggest correcting 'dorment' to 'dormant'. It was probably just a typo ^_^;
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oops ^_^;;
you're are good at titles caz chan you named one 'Blade' for me
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That title sucked, I don't know why you used it ^_^;
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because it fitted and made the reader see the double meaning of the poem
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Trapped
Trapped in a corner
No where to turn
Her hands tied together
She weeps for the sunlight
And fears the darkness
That surrounds her very being
She tries to breathe in deeply
But her breath is short and soundless
Her eyes close in fatigue
But she snaps them back open
Her heart pounding against her ribs
That ache with bruises and sores
She calls out for help
Her voice dry and unfamiliar
She calls for the promise of happiness
But it now seems like a distant memory
Clouded by fog of forgotten dreams
She lies slumped in the corner
Her head facing the floor
As blood drips slowly from her blue lips
any comments happily recieved even bad ones :P
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THIS POEM IS COOL!!! for some reason it reminds me of the girl on the grudge! shinie for u
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it does? O.o
it was supposed to represent a child/ teenager who had been kidnapped and left to die.. which she does
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Like the others that you've written, this one also has wonderful imagery Amy-chan. I really can see her alone in the dark and suffering.
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Really good if a shade disturbing...though I'd like to know how she died, if she has blood dripping from her lips o_O
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because she was beaten and left by her abductor
v_v
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All I can see is darkness
All I can hear is my soul crying
For loves everlasting kiss
Blood pours from the side of my head
Dripping endlessly onto the cold
Concrete floor
Dripping, dripping
My souls wails and strange images flash in my head
A baby
A child
Then death.
By me!
need critical comments please!
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My heart ackes more and more every day...
This thorn that is deap in my heart leavs a way for all the blood to flow out through leaving nothing more then pain left....
It is no reall hope left...
The infection have speard and is slowly making my heart turn blacker every day...
Slowly making my heart harder....
It will sone be like a rock ones again....
They say it is better to have loved and lost insted of never have loved at all.....
I say it is a lie....
If you never have loved some one you will never feel the pain when they go away....
A life of lonlyness is better then a life of missery...
Oh god why did you do this to me....?
Why did you let it happend...?
Why did you not stop it...?
thos questions have I askt myself many times but it is to late now....
There will never be a awnser to that....
And if it will I wont lissen...
you say it is faith...?
meant to be...?
I wont tell you what to belive but it was not meant to be that she schold not have died that nigth...
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HI Framer!!
and another amazing poem!
to be honest i cant think of any bad points off the top of my head!
welldone!
*hugs*
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He holds the picture
In his damp hands
His fingers tremble in shock
He looks up to the sky pleading
But slumps back
his eyes shining with tears
Of regret and loneliness
the same scene replays in his head
An arguement
A fist
A door
Replaying like a broken record
he throws the picture to the floor
and his girl lies smiling back.
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if you can call a memory a poem so okay...
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Hi Framer! Welcome back to Henheart's! ^__^
Both poems are very well written. Like your pervious one Amy-chan, this one also has the powerful image of a small child suffering in a harsh and cruel environment. And yours is excellent as well Framer. Words from the heart are the truest poetry there is.
On a different note, there is some history between Framer and myself and I understand the origins from which Framer's peom comes from (although I'm not really free to discuss that). But, I have to ask myself, do Amy's poems have a similar source? The imagery you use Amy is so vivid, so real ...
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it does? O.o
..........
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I’d Do Anything…
Sunlight crawls across the floor,
And I cower in the shadows,
My heart lies shining,
Shattered into so many pieces,
That the puzzle of my life can never be completed,
I hear your voice constantly in my aching head,
Your voice that could soothe the angriest ocean,
But it doesn’t soothe my abused soul.
I can’t be free of you,
I must be free of you,
I’d fall to the floor full of life no more,
I’d do anything to forget you,
Anything to be rid of the torment and horror,
But each time I try your face is there
Laughing at my feeble attempts…
I must be free of you,
I am free of you,
I’d fall to the floor full of life no more,
I’d do anything to forget you,
Anything to be rid of the torment and horror,
But each time I try your face is there
Laughing at my feeble attempts…
You walk in,
Your eyes full of fake regret,
But I’m not your puppet anymore,
You see the bottle,
You see the body,
And you see my shattered heart,
But all you do is run.
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Wow, another great poem Amy-chan! This one too has wonderful imagery - I can see the pictures in my mind of what's happening as I read the verses. The contradiction of the anguish of love comes through very strongly.
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thankies MJ-chan ^_^
i do like this poem because ive managed to take an old one and made it longer and really change it alot
personally id like the idea of id do anything to be rid of you forever compared with the fact that most people willt hink that id do anything to be with you etc
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wowies amy-chan!
Your getting very good at this! Not that you werent good in the first place that is! ^_^;;
YAY for amy!
*hands out baked goods*
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thankies H-chan
*eats baked goods*
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Amy that was brilliant the emotions were so strong and powerful it was a joy to read u have a natural gift at this
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i do O.o
thanks neil-kun
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I can’t be free of you,
I must be free of you,
I espeically like the reverse imagery used in these two lines, I'd love to see a poem with more of this kind of thing in ^_^ Great job!
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thankies everyone
*huggles all*
^_^
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Every day and every night,
She hears the sound of dripping blood,
Every day and every night,
She hears the sound of a heartless thud,
Every day and every night,
She hears the screams in her mind,
Every day and every night,
She hears the voice of an agonizing shout,
Every day and every night,
She hides away from the light.
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Short but sweet...
Well, not sweet, exactly... o.O
But you know what I mean... >_<
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yep...
i got a rhythm in my head walking home one night and then the words kinda formed around it ^_^;;
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Time.
The promise of tomorrow
Clouded by a smile of yesterday
The innocence of her past
Surrounded by the guilt of today
Her future full of mystery
Her past a simple lie
Her messed up mind
Messes up the dimensions of time.
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That's quite different from your earlier ones Amy-chan. It seems highly metaphysical while the other poems you've written in the past were vivid with cold reality. Each time I read this one, I get a different meaning from the words. ^_^
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They seem like song lyrics to me, so maybe there is a musical tune to go with it?
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thanks MJ-chan *huggles*
i wrote this one in school when i was hearing the things... which is why i dont know the true meaning behind it ^_^;; which i suppose is a good thing
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ive alctually recorded myself saying this poem on my old tape recorderas it has a stronger rhythm than my others... i would have done it onto the computer then uploaded it onto here but i cant because i dont have a microphone >_<
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Yes, that is a good thing because it leaves it to the reader to discover their own meaning in those words. ^_^
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im going to post up my latest creation later me thinks....
its for my drama lessons itll hopefully be up latest tommorrow
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My fantasy
I wish for a world
Where I can be free
Just spread my wings
And let go f this pain
You don’t hit me with
Unjustified hate
Or shout abuse at my face
Laugh at my mistakes
I wish for a world
Where you don’t haunt my dreams
Or taunt me when im awake
But this is a lie
Im holding onto a childhood dream
Grasping it with both hands
But this isn’t real
Who I seem is not me
This can never be a reality
This is a fantasy
My fantasy
this is my poem that is read out at the end of my drama piece ^_^
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Coolies, but dperessing as always ^_^;; I kind of get "Imagine" vibes from it, did you have that song in mind when you wrote it?
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God, I hate that song...
But I do get a similar vibe from it...
I like the rhythm of it too, kinda bouncy/angry.. o.O
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er... o.o i wrote anoterh version of this a while ago then changed it to fit my drama...
my teacher thought it was too depressing though.. even though the girl had committed suicide!! >.<
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Hmm, it didn't seem quite that depressing to me, but there is a lot of sadness in it. I guess that it does remind me of that John Lennon song. None of us can ever live in an ideal world which is unfortunate, but as long as we keep a vision of it in sight, there will always be new ideas for us to make the world better.
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I sit in a darkened shadowed room
My eyes filling yet again
Tears of lost hope fall to the ground
My cheeks burning from salt
I try to stop the tears falling
But they carry on each time I come close
More fall against my will.
A blade the salvation of life,
The essence of love
The release of sorrow,
From my bleeding veins
Scarlet liquid falls
Forming red tears that drip
From my hand to the shadows
I wait
For the shadows to devour me completely.
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This one is also very visual Amy-chan, but I really like how you drew parallels between the blood and the tears. ^__^
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thanks Mj chan
reflected what i was like and what i wanted to do yestersday if that makes sense o.o
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Erm, actually it makes perfect sense Amy-chan. *Huggles* It's the reason why your poems are so good, the feelings that you put into them are real. ^_^
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most of them are a few arent... but thats very few
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Light flashes,
Colours hypnotise,
Head thumps,
Voices scream,
Blade cuts,
Blood pours,
Tears fall,
Muscles ache,
Heart breaks.Â
Need help with a name… yet again ^_^;;
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Got a weird sense of Deja vu when reading that you know, have I read it before? o_o
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yes you have XD
i read it to you outside your english classroom while we were waiting for H-chan XD
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It's like word association with shock value Amy-chan. ^_^;;
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i was playing word assisiation with the person i sit next to in english before i wrote it (they expect us to look for more quotations? o.o)
then it kinda came to me as usual XD
i like it though im not sure why.. might be cos i used a different layout or something *shrugs*
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go proffesional!! Give the other poets areses with your true feelings.
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i am not going proffessinal!
im not that good o.o
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Erm, you do have the talent to be a professional Amy-chan! ^__^ However, you'll need to keep writing and develop your skill to make a living at writing poetry. You can do it methinks though! ^_^
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Reincarnated Pain.
Instruments of doom,
Play one final tune,
Fifteen years down the drain,
She wished shed never live again,
Voices shouting all the time,
She couldnt cope she was lost inside,
Feeling sick in her head
Her heart was always full of dread,
Her friends told her to stay away
She just lost control that day,
To stab herself all she wanted to do,
But instead she struggled another day through
well i did warn you...
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Ode to MKR
Not one of this world
I’m an alien being in a world of darkness
A world with destruction and fear,
A land where the heart rules all,
A world where I don’t belong.
A sword to defeat evil,
Armour to protect this foreign skin,
A world I have sworn to protect forever,
But back I go to the world where
I don’t want to belong anymore.
meh this is crappy. i wrote it after watching the first 3 episodes again..
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Cool... i cant do poetry. I only do crappy little ones.
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ha! if you think this is good *which it isnt*
you havent read my reincarnated pain one XD
even i like that one O.o
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SO COOLIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
XD
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*GLOMP*
Amy that is really cool in that depressive OMG your going suicidal way! ^_^
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whoa!
calm down dear XD
i am proud of this one i really am.. and it rhymes *bounces around the room*
there be funny symbols for no reason though >.<
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breathe H-chan dont die T_T
anyways....
whats with the symbols >.<
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*Huggles* A really great poem, I have to say again that it's upsetting to think it's been based on feelings that you've had but hey ^_^ "Funny symbols" - try editing your post? It's the apostrophes, I've noticed it coming up on a few other posts as well. Stupid alt codes screwing around I think >_<
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*hugs back*
thanks caz-chan ^_^
actually its rare for my poems to be based on real things. i had the worst week yesterday and i had stuff like this swirling in my head so i had to write it down
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Sometimes.
Sometimes I wish for the answers,
Sometimes I wish for the truth,
The same things I wish for,
And everyday I wish for you.
Sometimes I cry on my own,
Sometimes I cry with everyone around,
I still cry the same,
Twisted tears falling down.
Sometimes I feel like death,
Sometimes I feel like im dead,
I still feel the same,
As I lie dead with your picture in hand.
Blood on a rose (by ashley and me)
Her twisted fate,
Blood drips down her screaming face,
Men taunt her,
Tease her,
Rape her,
Treat her like the dirt,
Beneath a dying rose,
Throw her away,
Like she never had a meaning
Never had a reason
To live, to breathe,
To die
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Hidden Emotion.
tears form in my blackened heart,
Failing to fall,
Failing to show their true form,
Heart beating,
Pushing all emotion away,
tears hiding behind a faceless mask,
Forced smiles,
heart weeping dee inside,
The unseen wish,
An unfulfilled dream.
Maze Of Life and Death.
Heartless tears,
Etched onto a lifeless face,
A past of ongoing pain,
A continous wander through,
A maze full of mirrors.
A shattered reflection,
Broken up by hate,
A heart bursting with lies,
And a mind swamped with guilt,
An emotionless smile,
And eyes dull with death.
Hourglass.
Waiting for the next hour to come,
Then my time will be done,
1 pill, 2 pill, 3 pill,4
How many pills till i hit the floor?
Body screaming out in pain,
Minutes tick by,
legs falling to the ground,
heart beating out of time,
Vicious whispers,
panic rising,
grains of sand falling,
falling,
Last grain falls,
Body lying on the floor.
The last ones around a month old now, the hidden emotion around a week old and maze of life and death i just finished!
so what you all think?
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wowies amy-chan
those are really cool! ^_^
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thankies ^_^
i dont like the maze one much though...
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Melikes it, but I think I like Hourglass the most because of its preoccupation with time (i.e. the counting line and the one after). Incidentally if you take 7 Ibuprofen pills one after the other, that's enough ^_^
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the hourglass was developed from the lines:
1 pill, 2 pill, 3 pill, 4 how many pills till i hit the floor?
it was in my head weeks ago and i was so depressed i developed it.
no-ones replied tp my other 2 poems! *cries*
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They're both very different Amy-chan. The first one seems sad and melancholy, a picture of lonliness. The second one seems violent and shocking, very much the opposite of the first one. It's like a picture of hate, while the first one just shows a lack of love.
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Aww, *Huggles* I liked all three of them Amy-chan. Like with your previous poems, there is also wonderful imagery in these too. I can clearly see things like the blackened heart, masks, maze of mirrors, and the sands of time. Maybe I just have a visual mind, but your talent for getting me to see such things is a beautiful gift. ^_^
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Writing it down is a really great way to get feelings like that out of your system and throw them away. I know too that stress and anxiety can make one's mind see things that aren't really there. Just remember how much all of us love you Amy-chan because the fear of thngs not real cannot deny what is real. ^_^ *Huggles*
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*hugs back*
thankies MJ-chan.
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thankies ^_^
my english teacher says i use too much imagery and descriptive stuff in my work XD
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I wrote the first one literally around a year ago i just forgot it was in my school documents O.o
The blood on a rose was started by me (up to the line ' rape her') and ashley wrote the ending as she wanted to and i couldnt be bothered.
i like them both in their own ways and the blood on a rose seems different to what i usually write.. well i think so. i agree that its more violent but i still think theres a hidden truth in it somewhere.
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Childish Nightmare.
Lost in a world of rainbows and butterflies,
Escaping this world, rid of its lies,
Away with the hidden pain,
But you cant hide this shame,
What makes them so great?
Standing up above me like God,
But ill bring them down,
make them taste the poison of their lives,
through broken dreams and snapped wishes,
Ill rise above them,
A twisted fantasy swirled woth guilt,
Ill change this childish retreat,
Rip down all the rainbows with my torn hopes,
Squeeze the butterflies with this pressure, this stress,
For everyone of their pathetic one night stands,
Ill shatter their hearts,
No regard for life,
For every repressed emotion,
Consumed within my darkened soul,
Ill sit in my childhood dream,
out of place with these bloodened fingers,
i am the nightmare of childish innocence,
The vision of my empty soul.
this was in a weird way inspired by Caz-chans poem. im not sure how but after i read it all these lines came out of no where O.o
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Hmm, the whole idea of squishing butterflies is something that I can really see you doing because I know how much you don't like them. It's true that every one of us has our childhood fantasies and over time they sort of just sadly fade away and vanish. It's part of growing up and getting old, but as long as we have things like anime and movies, we can always find new fantasies to live. ^_^
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i kinda see it as a reflection of a childhood dream changed with maturity and pain.
'they' are the people who have ever put me down who have ever told me i cant do it... those who think they are better than everyone.
Ripping down rainbows etc is trying to grow out of childhood in a weird twisted way
it makes little sense to be honest XD
but im drawn to the words for some reason..
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Woah, I love it o_o It's very different to the stuff of yours that I've read before, maybe because of some of the rhymind lines (you don't rhyme much, you prefer straight verse methinks). It's very bittersweet in the sense that you had these fantasises and others did too but now you're destroying them, you're hurting but you're satisfying yourself with revenge if those parallels work o_O And it's interesting to read that my poem "inspired" you, I haven't read your comment on mine yet so I wouldn't know ^_^;;;
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And they sent you to hell,
In the back of your mind,
Where the shadows thrive,
And the real you hides,
You slept with the angels,
Raped their innocence and dignity,
But now with your eyes aflame,
And your piercing cries shattering the,
Silent night sky,
They take their revenge,
Stabbing pins through your torn broken heart,
And stealing away all your hope,
They stand there,
Angelic graces in a land of hate and pain,
Watching you,
Staring at you with heartless eyes,
As you wither and die.
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um.... is it really that morbid? o_o
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*Laughs* It is, I apologise - but that wasn't why I didn't see it, I just got used to there being no replies in this forum so I forgot to check ^_^;;;
There's some really good imagery in here, it shows you progressing as an author - the only thing I'd suggest is changing a couple of the lines (making them shorter?) because they seem to break up the rhythm a little strangely when I read it to myself. But other than that, which is a personal preference anyway, great job! ^_^
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yeah i know what you mean and ive been working on that.. im making my way through all my poems and doing that ever since my english teacher advised it.
but thankies *glomp*
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Alcoholic Torture
Alcoholic poisons,
Licking his cracked, drying lips,
Eyes bloodshot,
Drowned in self pity,
Passers by tut,
At the half empty bottle in hand,
Reaching out for love,
Letting it run through bloodied fingers,
Tears fall through the bottles rim,
Neutralising the liquor with raw emotion,
Pure heartbroken loneliness,
Hidden in his drunken state,
His ragged, torn clothes a reflection,
Of his broken, abused heart,
Lying in a gutter staring up,
At the starlit sky,
The now empty bottle by his side,
Each star a forgotten hope engulfed by his self-torture.
I do realise i havent wrote anything in over a month but heres the latest works ^_^
Its an idea that ive been trying to get into words for a while now and heres my outcome.
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Young lonely girl,
Wanders through dark empty streets,
Eerie shadows creep,
Catch her with invisible hands,
Hooded figure follows,
Watching her from afar,
Catches up quickly,
Grabs her from behind.
Girl struggling against masculine grip,
Conflicting stench of sweat and alcohol
Linger on his skin,
He tears away material,
Revealing her naked flesh,
Untouched by any other human,
Displayed like a whore.
Forcing himself into her,
Against a woman’s will,
Treat her like a toy,
A cheap fix, Remember
all men are above,
History records state that,
Women just his minions,
Open to unwanted hate.
He leaves her lying helpless,
No care and no regret,
But not without threatening her into silence,
Blade held tight against her neck.
Young lonely girl,
Lost in herself torture,
Her head a shrine to repressed memories,
Her heart willing to forget,
Her confidence a shattered mirror,
Her trust in men long gone,
An empty shell of a human,
Who longs for her delayed death.
~
This is a result of too much empathy about something and some other stuff. As Liz and H both suggested it I took out the chorus to use elsewhere. If anyone wishes to know what the chorus was (why you would.. i have no idea O_o) then just PM me. ^_^
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I get lots of feelings of lonliness, helplessness, worthlessness, but also hate and violence from this one ... how about "Stained Flower" ?
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ooooo the best suggestion ive had so far me thinks ^_^
I am proud of this one but it needs some time for editing.. i might ask my english teacher for some help there..
I now name it stained flower! thankies mj-chan *huggles* ^_^
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Wheeeeeee!! ^__^ *Dances with Amy-chan*
Mee happies that you likes it Amy-chan. ^_^ *gives shiniess*
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*dances* ^__^
I like it cos it fits in a number of senses.
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I spoke to you about the poem on MSN already ^_^ I'll just say - great title! You're right, it fits in a lot of ways...
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Yaayy!! Caz-chan likes it too! ^__^
*Dances around with Caz-chan and gives out more shinies.* ^__^
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Empty Shell.
An empty shell of a whore,
A hidden smile,
One broken law,
A shattered mirror,
A collapsed trust,
But a tear can’t mend,
Your broken heart,
Wishing from a wishing well,
Guilt overtaking sense and hurt,
Feeling so small so insignificant,
No one can feel this pain,
No one sees what’s deep inside,
No one sees the truth,
Everyone can empathise with you,
But only dribbles and drabbles come my way,
This is the end my forever friend,
This is my final plea,
This whore feels no emotion,
This whore lies dead forever more…
Not much to say about this. There not much to say anymore...
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Coolies. Kill rapist bastard!!!! *gets out knife*
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aww thankies hun *huggles*
You've read the new one ive posted.. meh..
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My Betrayed Friend.
Welcome to the end,
My betrayed friend,
Welcome to your satisfaction,
My betrayed friend,
Hear my last cry,
My betrayed friend,
Feel my last breath,
My betrayed friend,
Watch my life slip away,
My betrayed friend,
Dont say goodbye,
My betrayed friend,
In hell I will reside,
My betrayed friend,
But in your hurt eyes,
Thats when I truly died.
Again this is raw emotion from my heart
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i figured. errrmmm advice Amy-chan. me thinks it is time u stop dwelling on what u did. its done now and everything is over and u lost a lot. stop crying and saying its ur fault coz people get tired of it..........try to smile coz mopeing won't make it any better than it already is. smile okay.
nice poem though.
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Ill never stop blaming myself for this.. i just cant do that.
But smiling.. well a little optimism here and there really does go a long way.
Im finally looking forward and trying to see the light at the end of this ^_^
and i remind you.. i did write this monday then typeds it up the tuesday.. so it was still immensly raw emotion then.
but thanks alex-chan *huggles*
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In not sure if this is exactly correct, but what I see here is similar to the feelings that I saw Hikaru having in the beginning of the second season of Rayearth. Even though she started out with the best of intentions, Hikaru wound up doing something horrible and hated herself for it afterwards. Hikaru eventually had the opportunity to make up for what she did and things were okay in the end. Even thought it might seem corny, I think that you'll have a chance to make up for what happened too Amy-chan. So try not to dwell on it because that will only feed your anxieties. Instead, try to look for an opportunity to set things right again. *Huggles* ^_^
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Eeepiess, some very powerful despair there in that one, but also very eloquently written. A work of poetry can be very beautiful even if the subject matter is very dark. v_v *Huggles*
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*huggles*
thanks Mj and i guess in a sense it is like Hikaru in the second series. I dont want to go into details but i finally see what people mean by optimism going a long way though
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Good good. now cheer up!!! or else i get mad.......people who are depressed all the time get on my nerves and i eventually get tired.sorry but i have to say this now before its too late.
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you probably hate me then... v_v
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*huggles back*
thanks Mj-chan. I dont really want to talk about this one much..
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Okies. *Huggles* ^__^
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Now, now, I doubt that she does Amy-chan. *Huggles* Depression can be contagious to a certain extent, but so can happiness, so try to hang out with people that are feeling good and do some things that you enjoy. Getting your mind off of regretful issues can help a lot. ^_^
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Im trying. Im trying so hard but people don’t always see that. My councillor even said its going to take a *long* time until I can be who im trying to become hopefully with their help and my friends support I can get there easier and quicker but my supports wearing think now. Im getting lost in myself and confused. My self-confidence is failing again and im losing the small part of optimism I have. This is going to take a long time.. but its getting harder and harder to maintain how far I get.
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*huggles back*
thankyou.
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There was another solution that I found to my own problems that are similar. As you know at a young age I found that I couldn't live as the person I was inside either, not without a great deal of hardship anyways. Until I was quite a bit older I never even realized that there were other people like me. For a while I thought that I was unique, truly totally alone. So I developed a new persona that the world found acceptable and hid my real one in a universe of my imagination. It's not something that I would recommend that anyone else do unless you're really desperate, but it is possible.
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I try to hide who i really am.. thats why i dont always seem distant because i dont feel like how im appearing.
I dont like this I do feel like im alone but i know im not. I feel like im taking everything for granted and that then makes me feel like im being self centred.. I just cant win.
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Mask.
My forgotten friend,
My saviour for all these years,
My cherished love,
Eye slits shaped only for me,
A space to breathe,
Whispered words, forgotten lies,
Its forever protection against the cold reality of truth.
My hidden friend,
My spiritless soul, my dying trust,
With no complaint from being my lie,
For long I have abandoned you,
Forsaken your friendship,
Left you to rot,
But now I place you over my face,
Your life is restored,
Welcome back my forever friend,
My mask.
Ive edited this a little but i still dont think it flows.. meh...
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Ok until a few moments ago i didnt even remember writing this *shrugs*
i do have the memory of a seive though ^_^;;
anyways enjoy.. well kinda it is depressing after all..
My Backstabber.
Drowned in your sorrow,
I try to show a brave face,
But inside I’m crumbling,
I’m fading away.
You broke my heart once,
And the pain is still there,
Even after all these years,
I long for your face.
You let my hand slip,
You let me fall,
Into the darkness,
Of forgotten hope,
I can hear your voice echoing,
Off these shadowed walls,
But you’re too far away,
We drifted apart.
I’m all alone now,
There’s no one to guide me,
I miss you I long for your touch,
My backstabber.
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Walk into this over dramatised hollywood scene,
Let death suffercate your cynical smile,
Miscoloured tiles underfoot,
White clean appearence now tingled with crimson,
Couldnt you hear my final cry,
Didnt you listen to my screamed out lie
Or were you too busy at 'work' again,
your wretched fingers caressing her flawless skin,
embraced in eachothers forbidden ectasy,
did i say something wrong?
something a feeble sorry wont solve,
am i just not as pretty as you say,
do you even care that im gone,
will you miss my worn smile,
like the moth to the flame i was drawn to you,
and like the flame you burnt away all my hope,
what do i care anymore?
What do i care when you couldnt hear my...
final...
fatal...
Scream...
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woah.......that. was. good.......
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thanks.. i think...
Just so you know in the title the 'love' part should be crossed out and replaced with suicide - if that makes sense...
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okies.
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You were bright, a shining star,
Left me hiding in the dark,
You were fire, a burning flame,
Drawn to your light like a moth I came,
You kept me warm, kept me safe,
Until I broke from your embrace,
Saw you for what you really were,
Healed all my mistakes, found the cure,
Felt the pain come flooding back,
Put my life back on track,
Ran away from your hypnotic light,
Watched as you threw your life away,
Ignoring all the shame,
Alcohol, sex, drugs your lifelines,
Trapped in your own hate and loneliness,
Watch as your light finally
Goes
Out…
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Hmm, very tragic this one is, but different from a lot of the previous ones. This time the tragedy centers around another person, someone close to the author and who means a lot to them. In many ways it's harder to watch someone you love suffer than to endure the suffering yourself.
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Espically someone you could trust..
thanks Mj.. i kind of went for a different approach with this poem thisis amianly shown by the increased rhyming.
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I don't think I've seen much of your rhyming stuff before, but I'm a sucker for "old-school" style poetry and I thought this was beautiful. Very tragic, like Mj said almost more so than your other poems because it's from another person's viewpoint, but still very good. Maybe one of my favourites of everything you've written.
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wow thanks caz ^_^ *hugs*
Im not good qwith rhymes but i wanted to rhyme this one for some reason.. i guess i wanted a change ^_^;; but thanks!
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yup yup it's so coolies, amy-chan *huggles* i was wondering.... is it about someone you know? or perhaps yourself from a different perspective? or just soemthing you made up? sorry... me got a little confused with the other posts... me too tired
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It *is* about someone i once knew. I dont know them anymore we went to different high schools.
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ah okies... so thepeom is how you *knew* them not *know* them?
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I guess... I know stuf about them now hence near the end of the poem.
She used me as a friend to do all her 'dirty work' and when i found out it was up to me alone to sort my life out again and to try and not let it happen again.
The drawn towards asspect of the poem is because she was popular. One of the most popular people in our school and i became friends with her.
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Bloodsplattered rainbow
Cant you see the tears in my hair?
The bruises on my thighs?
The cuts in my wrists?
The rips in my hips?
The cracks on my lips?
The tears in my eyes?
The fractures in my back?
The slashes on my waist?
The blisters on my feet?
The rope around my neck?
The pain in my cries?
The guilt that resides inside?
And my hope that has died…?
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Very vivid, and I like the few rhymes that you included ^_^ (Old-school poetry lovers UNITE!) Dresden Dolls influenced?
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Very much so. i started writing this one earlier in the week when i was on a dresden dool high. I love the lyrics to girl anachronism so much that i wanted to write a smilar poem the the begging lines.
This is the result. I dont think i copied any of the lyrics themselves if so not delebratly i used ey words and changed them.
the title itself is from someones username on gaia. It was 'bleeding rainbow' which i then changed into 'bloodsplattered rainbows'.
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I am not on drugs this is just a nonscence poem i think 0_o
Twisted fairytales, falling down stairs,
Eyes rolling back, the fatal crack,
Insane laughter, my childhood taunter,
Falling down the rabbit hole, whisper goodbye to abused souls,
Drunken hallucination, multicoloured ravens,
The vipers tongue, demons lunge,
Cast the evil witches spell, unadulterated hell,
Confused screams, broken up moonbeams,
Hypnotic spirals, hidden light from the candle,
Alice is waiting, cant you hear her?
Snap out of this crazed trip, Get a tight hold get a grip,
Fall back into realitys arms, But its your embrace that I long,
Welcome to my daily fix filled with twisted fairytales.
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i know a nonsense poem. heheh my told dad told me:
one fine day in the midly of the night,
2 dead men got up to fight,
back to back they faced each other,
they drew their swords and shot each other.
anyway other than that coolies.
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XD that rawks alex =P
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They're both pretty coolies A & A ^_^ The Alice in Wonderland theme goes along nicely with yours too Amy-chan. ^_^
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Thanks MJ-chan ^_^
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I forgot it and i can;t be bothered to read it and i just want to post so that why i'm here O_o
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This poem was inspired by a friend of mine on gaia. She was sexually molestered by her ex boyfriend, and often cybered with other guys. She told me about it and it prompted a poem, shes seen it and she does like it.. i dont like the end though.. >_<
Online Lover
Hard drive threatening fire,
Flicking monitors, Hypnotic trance,
Lust vented through worn wires,
My virtual lover,
My unrealistic love,
Laughing, teasing, words translated,
Across the oceans, seas, forests,
Through satellites, emails fly,
Wingless, heartless messages soar,
Self centred passion, flow of enamored words,
Artificial sexual relationship, but,
Its not real, It means nothing, harmless fun,
Until the real guy wants you,
This time there’s no choice,
There’s no pleasure in hate.
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Very different to anything else I've seen you write, and very powerful too - I loved it! I'm feeling inspired now myself XD (Wasn't that the other way round last time?)
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thanks.. and whoa your inspired o_0
Its different yeah, i noticed that too.. /edited the end of the poem
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It is very different, but very good too. It's a subject that I've always found strange, because like the poem indicates, cybering isn't much more than roleplaying. That's the way that I've seen it because I'd been married and involved with the real thing long before I'd found the internet.
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I was trying to make it seem like fun until reality comes in. it was my friends escape, she was too scared to end the realtionship and used her roleplaying skills to vent out her anguish. Its a strange way of doing it i know but it worked for her *shrug*
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Well this is now going to be my poetry thread from now on and to get the ball rolling (cliche >.<) heres a poem i dug up, edited and am proberly re-posting!
I hope you enjoy my poetry and more critical responses are more than welcomed! ^_^
Sometimes.
Sometimes I wish for the answers,
Sometimes I wish for the truth,
The same things I wish for,
And everyday I wish for you.
Sometimes I cry on my own,
Sometimes I cry with everyone around,
Still the tears forn,
The endless battle, my final fall,
Sometimes I...
I dont want you here,
Break away from my embrace,
Stay away from the monster i am!
Sometimes I feel like death,
Sometimes I feel like im dead,
I still feel the same,
As I lie dead with your picture in hand.
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O.o, wow, ^^
*claps*
thats good
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Thanks Jane! ^_^
I wouldnt consider it one of my best but i never do ^_^;;;
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Im not sure whether to consider this poem finished yet, im struggling with an ending or something to add. It just feels to me unfinished. If any disagrees I'd like to know with reasons if thats ok ^.^
Ying Yang.
Hear her voice,
An angel singing,
I am the demon,
Forever lost in your bloody heart,
Hunting you out,
My blood splattered prey!
I am the monster,
Your darkest nightmare,
She is your seraph,
Your only love,
I am the shadow on this moonlit night,
She is the candle,
Forever burning too fucking bright.
Gaze into my corrupted soul,
Repair my shattered smile,
Give into eternal infatuation,
Revive my rotten heart,
Don’t leave me alone!
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Well its about bloody time I got some poems here >_<
So heres the new ones!
Nothing Special.
There I go again,
In another mans naked embrace,
I’m just another angel fallen from grace,
This isn’t the Romeo and Juliet romance you crave,
This love won’t send us to our premature grave,
I’m stuck watching my holo-genetic heart bleed,
Basking in the light of the broken hearted,
I can feel my lies,
Your constant cries,
Pleasure, pain,
I can’t tell anymore,
These wings are disappearing
My soul forever burning,
I don’t care don’t you see?
I’m not the perfect princess you want me to be,
I’m lying here, Next to someone I don’t know,
I’m nothing special, Just a snowflake in the snow.
I'll keep falling through,
Your empty hands,
I cant be caught,
I cant be saved,
I'll keep hiding behind this broken frame,
A photograph burning,
The edges curling,
Butterflies swarming,
Silent mourning,
My fatal attraction,
Your empty reaction,
I'm screaming,
I'm crying,
I'm dying.
The second is un-named and un-finished..
blargh!
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jeez louise choco sauce,
dude,. your poems are getting more and more powerfull, youll blow up the planet, well, technically you wont, but, its sounds better, ^^;;
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Thanks.. *sweatdrop*
I didnt expect that.. its nice when someone comments XD
Thanks cookie-chan *huggles*
<3
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Mirror.
I look inside this broken mirror,
I hide behind its worn frame,
I see the reflection of a broken hearted,
Lost in adolescent rage.
I scream out for salvation,
Throw away your razorblade,
Reach out for this insanity,
Regret, our childhood friend.
I shun away the anguish,
Protect you from yourself,
Feeble attempts to mend,
Your bleeding heart,
I stare ahead,
Exact pain, exact torture,
Differ in the reflection,
Of our former selves.
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Jaysus, I haven't read any of your poems in ages. I really like Online Lover and your stuff... Agh, I'll come back tomorrow when I'm coherant
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o.O
Okies.. I dont think many people come here anymore..
And I havent wrote in a while now..
>_<
Anyways, thank-j00 sims!
me luffs you bigtime!
<33
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Walk down this road Denile.
I thought you were an angel,
I thought you were a star,
But now I see through heartless eyes,
What a bitch you really are.
I thought you were perfect,
I thought you were my life,
But now I see with bleeding veins,
What a liar you really are.
I thought you were attractive,
I thought you were envied,
But now I see through mirror eyes,
What a mess you really are.
Didn't you think they'd see the scars,
Didn't you think they'd know,
All the times you cried yourself to sleep,
I was protecting you..
There are actually 2 reasons behind this one and both I wish not to discuss at the present.
But please read and tell me what you think.
Its been a month since I've wrote anything so excuse the crappines xD
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Woo, updateing-ness!
^o^
Rainbow Girl
Will you be my red girl?
My lustful, devious passionate whore?
Your the girl with the black dress,
The girl with the amorous smile,
Your the one who decieves your naive prey,
I want to be a red girl,
I want to be you,
Fucking slut.
Will you be my orange girl?
My inidividual random star,
Your the girl who doesnt care what others think,
Your the girl with the bright coloured heart,
The girl with the random style,
Your the one who dances between the raindrops,
I want to be an orange girl,
I want to be you..
Will you be my yellow girl?
My drugged up, stoned addict,
Your the girl with the LSD in hand,
The girl with used syringes littering her bedroom floor,
Your the one who relies on your fix, Your chemical release,
I want to be a yellow girl,
I want to be you,
You fucking junkie.
Will you be my green girl?
My envious, selfish, spoilt girl,
Your the girl whos never happy with what she has,
Your the girl with everything but nothing,
The girl who oozes jealously and self hatred,
Your the one who wants to be me but,
I want to be a green girl,
I want to be you.
Will you be my blue girl,
My depressed and self pitying girl,
Your the girl who cries herself to sleep,
The girl with broken promises filling up her heart,
Your the one who lives her life in her own thoughts,
I want to be a blue girl,
I want to be you,
Cry baby.
Will you be my indigo girl,
My lost, lonely and confused girl
Your the girl whos trapped in a mind she hates,
Your the girl who doesnt know who she is anymore,
The girl who sits in solitude,
Your the one who slits her wrists,
I want to be an indigo girl,
I want to be you.
Will you be my violet girl?
My deluded, conflicting girl,
Your the girl whos trapped between reality and illusion,
The girl whos pessimisim clashes with her optimism,
Your the one who screams at the mirror,
I want to be a voilet girl,
I want to be you,
Live your fairytale.
But I'll always be a rainbow girl,
The multicolured odd girl,
Your haunting sunset and
Your pessamistic sunrise,
Watch my smile though the rain?
I'm a whore, an individual, a drug addict envious bitch.
I'll always be the depressed, lonely and deluded girl all rolled into one,
Im not unquie or anything special,
But I'll always remain your faithful rainbow girl..
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Wow, these last two poems really show you maturing as an author and settling into a style - I really love the way you've decided to set out these poems, they're really individual. Please write more! ^_^
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Thankies Caz <3
Im finding it hard to write right now. Ill write a few lines for a poem then I dont like it.
:/
But thanks, and there is a kinda style in the last two.. and you pointed it out to me xD
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Empty Promises and Broken Bones
Blank sighs and bent back fingers,
Heartless kisses and ripped of nails,
Demons trapped in this atmosphere,
Monsters caught in pessimism's web,
Teeth snapping and Mouths salvating,
Eye her pale white skin,
With patterned gashes all over her,
Knife to skin, Skin to bleed, Knife Withdraw,
And repeat.
She's lost in her own torture,
A macarbre labyrinth,
Your patron saint of self injury.
Empty promises and broken bones,
Silent screaming and 'nasty head wounds',
Taunting voices, Monster enraged,
You can't kill her, You can't kill an idea,
Concieved in the mind of a confliction,
Stare at my mirror image,
My perfect silver-white scars,
A reminder of the past I now crave,
Knife to skin, Skin to bleed, Knife withdraw,
And no longer repeat,
An empty promise made,
A promise to be kept,
But can't she see? Can't she protect me?
I still hold my razorblade.
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oh me gee, i've actually wrote something that doesn't end after a few lines.
o:
yeah its been a while but at last an update!
One More Night.
Just for one more night let her,
Let her bleed into herself, Drown
this anguish and self loathing in
her endless emerald pit.
For one more night let her lay with you.
her hollow echo, Your tainted lullaby
Carry you into deliusional, hallocinagetic
Sates of unconciousness.
Just for one more night let her tears
stream down her china face, A punishment
for her guilt, an overbalanced
figure of no numeric value.
For one more night let her kiss you.
Heated passion of vampiric lust and indieciency,
Hide her secrets away with a masked smile,
A personality of dust.
Just for one more night let her be someone else.
Just for one more night let her scream.
Just for one more night let him break her.
Just for one more night stop her poisoned heart from beating!
[technical note: as the poem progresses the size of the writing enlarges. I guess this was to show the anger I felt when writing this poem.
I was angry at alot of things, primarily myself so as I wrote it in meh journal the writing became larger and less legiable. o_O]
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You certainly write best when your feeling such strong emotion, which can be seen as a good thing or a bad thing...Anyway, I like the repetition in this poem - makes it even stronger. Excellent job ^_^
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Thanks Caz! <3
I seem to use repition alot to empatheise something..
i tend to write more when I'm angry..
But I have a work in progress. It sounds weird saying that but its a poem Ive been wanting to write for ages and Ive started it and never finished it so im hoping I can get back and work on it..
^o^
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Good luck with the work in progress ^_^ I've been working on a 'poem' for the past week or so but it's just not coming together or saying anything about what I want to say. I'm tempted to leave it for a month or so, do you find that that helps?
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Unless it's a total whim and I really don't like it then I tend to leave it for a few months to allow new ideas to come and less frustration! xD
i can leave a poem for months on end then a new idea will come and I'll remember it and so on and so forth, so yeah you could see if that workds for you caz-chan.
^.^
G'yah, I sound like I've been writing professinally for years.. O_O
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is it me, or are your poems getting better and better, and longer and longer?
well, well done keep it up okies?
well, ya better, ^_^
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I wouldnt say either but less common.
I havent wrote in so long its annoying me.
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you should write one again, theyre awesome ^_^
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I'm trying.
Lack of inspiration or anything...
I really think I've lost my touch.
D':
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yea, i know what you mean, i have blocks from drawing, just relax, keep a pen and paper, and even if its nothing, just scrap it down, who knows it might be a best seller
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Well fuck me I'm back!
It has been too long since I revamped this place with my ramblings, so I am back..
Yes, I have a sudden small creative rush.
: D
This poem is very rocky, I know. I really do need the critism, I think.
It's very messy and makes little sense except I understand it myself since I wrote it.
If you read carefully you may get it..
I dunno. xD
Well enjoy - btw, structure/layout IS going to be worked on alot when I get around to it. C:
And it needs a title. o_o;;
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Escaping into crowded streets,
Pink teacups falling into egotastical shards,
Cars crashing into blinding red traffic lights.
Life machines hum into deafening green screaming.
Alice is running, Alice is crying, Alice is tripping.
Couples in photogrenetic ignorant, technicolour bliss,
Nails crumbling into ebony dust.
Hiroshima repeating itself over again.
Bomb falling,
People screaming.
Bomb crashing,
Cloud extinguishing.
Blue glass eyes deprived of their own lives,
China faces bleeding crimson into their own harrowing nightmares,
Lethal injections run freely through macarbe indigo veins.
Alice is dying, Alice is choking, Alice is deceased.
This static globe is spinning on a tilted axis,
Their war has tarnished proprous starters.
Delusional neon whispers of hope,
Dampened by cream peace contrats ripping,
Soldiers run obiendiently.
Guns laugh menacingly.
Children run fearfully,
The monochrome girl's laughing.
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o.o
whoa
cant
add critisism thingy
cuz
its just too darn good
no joke
its not random but its a different view of looking at things
woot
well done
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Woah, Ameh! That's amazing. Beautifully written. My only crit?
Hiroshima*
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.. i never noticed.. ah well.
XD
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My bad spelling strikes again.
*sweatdrop*
Thanks guys, my friend commented on how the rhythm destroys itself but I like it with no rhythm.
Makes it more dysfunctional and un-flowing.
o.O;;
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yeah, it dont have to rhyme cuz its a poem it has its own flavor